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Attempted Rape!

September 26, 2009

I woke up. A body was on top of me. There was duct tape over my mouth, more being placed over my eyes as I opened them.

I panic! Oh shit! What the hell??

Then I smell him. It’s Rick! I know the smell of my own husband.

As I try to open my mouth a corner of the duct tape comes off on one side of my mouth.

“What the fuck are you doing? Rick! What the hell??”

He jumps off of me and runs out of the house. I rip off the duct tape from my eyes and mouth and run to the window–Yep! There he goes! He’s running for his truck, jumps in and drives off. I yell out “You low-life son of a bitch!”

I look around the room. One of the windows was broken–I never heard it happen–I sleep like the dead. He most likely did it with a glass cutter and pushed it in as the cut glass edges were too perfect. The television and the VCR are gone. My guess is he needed drug money, decided to hock the TV and VCR at the pawn shop, but wanted it to look like a robbery/rape done by someone else.

I went back to bed, shaking so badly. I got back up and poured myself a glass of wine, took it to bed with me, and contemplated my next move.

This was it–THE END!! I couldn’t live like this anymore. I was a nervous wreck, the anxiety was causing health problems for me, my heart was racing most of the time. I was headed for a stroke or a nervous breakdown. I had to get out, get away from him.

But, how?

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16 Comments leave one →
  1. September 26, 2009 2:43 pm

    Oh my goodness, what a nightmare!
    I hope you post again soon…

  2. September 26, 2009 3:55 pm

    Thanks Jonie. Yes, it was a nightmare!!

  3. Cathy permalink
    September 26, 2009 4:37 pm

    Thats is terrible !!!!! I am so sorry you had to go through this, but you got out and that was the important thing . I was also married to a freaking drunk for 12 years so I know where you are coming from .

  4. September 26, 2009 5:02 pm

    Hi Cathy!! Long time no hear from!! Yep, if you lived with one for that long, you know just what I went through!

  5. September 27, 2009 12:41 pm

    Wow, I read this yesterday, and couldn’t put my thoughts together to leave a comment. Well, here I am today and still at a loss for words. It sounds like Rick, had finally escalated from being a drunk, drug addict, and abuser to being a thief and a rapist. Thank God you got out before he killed you. I shutter to think what he would be like today. Again I marvel, on you survived mentally.

  6. September 27, 2009 1:06 pm

    Thanks Nancy. I’ve often wondered that myself–would he have really killed me if he felt threatened in any way?? Glad I didn’t stick around to find out!!

  7. Margie permalink
    September 29, 2009 10:21 am

    I guess we’ve all had our own nightmares. Like the others, I’m glad you got out of it in time.

  8. September 29, 2009 10:35 am

    Thank you Margie. I’m hoping others will learn from my ‘nightmare’ and get out and be happy with the new life that awaits them.

  9. Groundy permalink
    September 29, 2009 1:10 pm

    Damn Barbie.. I just can’t say what I wanna say. I talked about this with same thing happening with our marriage therapist.

    Truely disgusting.
    Sorry this happened to you too.

  10. September 29, 2009 1:25 pm

    Hi Karen! Oh, I’m sorry if this happened to you, too!! Yes, incredibly disgusting!!

  11. October 4, 2009 2:01 pm

    Again, I am so thankful you are on the other side of these experiences to remind us that no matter how traumatic, others can get out too.

  12. October 4, 2009 6:07 pm

    Thank you Lea! Yes, others can get out, too. Some just have to reach a certain point when they say ‘enough is enough’!! Sadly, some never get to that point.

  13. Groundy permalink
    October 5, 2009 8:48 am

    Yeah, I agree Barb. Once you reach that point it’s like all the bells and whistles start going off and you get the backbone strength to say f*ck this! What was I thinking? It took a couple years of therapy both joint and single to come to terms with what it was.
    It just took me longer because I wanted to know why I was accepting it? I had never accepted anything nor had I allowed anyone close to me either; yet here I was now sucked into it.
    I just recently learned that it only takes about 72 hours of constant mental abuse to break someone down. So, the manipulation with booze filled crap thrown upon you leave you broken and battle shocked.

    Sorry for the long winded rant.
    Karen

  14. October 5, 2009 12:16 pm

    I love a long winded rant! Thanks Karen, I know you understand what I was going through and can appreciate my dilemma!

  15. December 1, 2009 10:33 pm

    omfg ….

    Sick, sick …

    I am so sorry this happened, but as others said I am SO glad you made it through to share it with others. Damn this makes me MAD!!!!

    ((hugs))

    (still catching up)

  16. December 2, 2009 10:56 am

    Thank you All Time!! I see you’re catching up! So glad you’re back! 🙂

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